Some people eat when they're bored; I Purell.

Do you understand word coming out of my mouth? Shit that's gonna go on the blog.

Africans are better than other people. When was the last time you saw a Chinese man outrun an African man? Never, NEVER.

Do you have to pay taxes annually?

He whispers sweet nothings in my ear.

I can translate Sean Paul songs. It's a fantastic skill of mine.

I want to bathe in it. It's like bathing in semen.

God damn it, this problem isn't a circle.

I love circles. Let no man speak ill of circles lest they die. Oh baby, two problems left, home stretch, HOME STRETCH.

A million no's and one yes counts as consent in court.

Nooooooo!!! I don't want to get a haircut! It's taken me three months, THREE MONTHS, to get to this point!

So I was standing on the subway and there was this couple standing right there whispering "He looks like a Jonas Brother!" Right in front of me!

I should get one of those t-shirts that says the man and the legend. Except I should have both of those arrows pointing up.

Why does she pronounce her name like that? Is it because she's Pakistani?

I want to be a Yuppie when I grow up.

I'm in the mood for some laughter. Cracked.com, feed me.

There was this dude at the gym who picked up 100 pounds in each arm and lifted them. The man was a bear. I was so hard for him.

Wait George, can you just bring the pan in with you in the shower and wash it? I've done it before with my pans.

This is Reggae! Today’s theme is 70s smooth rock!

I don’t want to really get strong, I want to appear strong.

I only shampoo once a day, but I condition three times a day

Hipsters fetishize the authentic

The purpose of PE is for me to relax... maybe to get a little stretching done if I wish.

I think we need more men.

I think I'll just do this naked actually, like the Greeks.

I don't like Gay men, but I am gay.

I want to buy a black skinny tie.

9/6/09

It's 68? That means I can wear long sleeves!

Blog Archive! I'm gonna be the first follower

9/5/09

New York is not that big of a tourist destination.

Women with pants - you know.